• 10.
    Greased Up Deaf Guy
    Mort can be so short sighted. The marketing potential here is unquestionable.
  • 9.
    Death
    If we'd known that "if you get my drift" meant "get me another fruit cup" it would have saved us a lot of needless trauma getting that A from our high school music teacher.
  • 8.
    The Cleaning Lady
    We have begun to say "Mr. Superman no here" when approached for anything by panhandlers, salespeople, bosses, and spouses. Results have been varied.
  • 7.
    Phineas and Barnaby
    The fitness industry has changed a lot over the years, but one thing remains constant: the electrifying homoeroticism.
  • 6.
    Al Harrington
    Neighbors do love a good lawn ornament. Al should do some cross promotion with the local seller of loud, dangerously aggressive dogs and aftermarket mufflers.